A Bunny of a Tale

Summary

Dive into the whimsical tale of a woman abducted by a bunny in medieval Portugal. Discover the magic and mischief of this enchanting story!

A bunny of a tale. Some time ago I read a story about a woman who lived during the beginning of the Middle Ages in Portucale or Portugale which is now known as Portugal who was abducted by a bunny rabbit. For six days and six nights the bunny rabbit made a full end of her and on the seventh day rested from all its work.

At some point the woman fell in love with her abductor even to the extent of refusing to cook and eat it as many of her neighbors wanted to do. Having intimate relations with certain animals was a common practice in Western Asia, or Europe as it is called, since the time of the Neandertal with rabbits being the mate of choice.

It had long been observed that during the spring equinox rabbits became highly motivated to produce offsprings. Being of different species it was impossible for the woman to conceive by way of the rabbit, which the rabbit was more aware of than the woman. Nonetheless, the constant infusion of the bunny rabbit’s Deoxyribonucleic acid (DNA) into the woman became a key component within the woman’s double helix.

This is a bunny of a tale that I read, so I cannot vouch for its authenticity. As the story goes, the successor to the Western Roman government, the church, learned about the woman’s infatuation with the bunny rabbit and sent emissaries to investigate it. The emissaries determined that the woman’s sexual obsession with the bunny rabbit was sound given the long-held practices of the peoples of Western Asia, or Europe as it is called.

As a means of showing dominance over and contempt for the common folks, the church encouraged men, and even paid them to perform all manner of lewd and lascivious acts with the woman, with those acts that seemed affordable in passing any amount of the woman’s Deoxyribonucleic acid (DNA) into the men most preferred.

To celebrate the coming of the spring equinox both males and females began to follow the woman’s practice by going out into the forest and the fields and copulating with whatever bunny rabbit that was found. The women were painted in many colors and conducted their search for bunny rabbits completely embarrassed; em(in)·bar(bare)·rassed(assed).

This is a bunny of a tale I know, but the rendering of the reading is firmly documented by folklore. It is said that the woman who adored the bunny rabbit was knighted by the church and may have even given birth to a bunny-person against all odds.

Now you know where and why the practice of the easter bunny originated, where the egg comes from, I do not know other than it being a symbol of fertility. Investigate for yourself and learn why Western Asians, called Europeans, are a bunny rabbit/human hybrid species.